


moonlight on the water, slipping through my hands

by AnxietyAvocado



Series: from dusk til dawn, i'll stay with you [5]
Category: Fruits Basket, Fruits Basket (Anime 2019), Fruits Basket - Takaya Natsuki (Manga)
Genre: Angst, Beach House, Death, F/M, Pining, fruits basket season 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-19
Updated: 2020-05-19
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:42:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24266839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnxietyAvocado/pseuds/AnxietyAvocado
Summary: kyo owes tohru the truth - he knows that. she wouldn't think any less of him. but it's still too much for him to say the words out loud.
Relationships: Honda Tohru/Sohma Kyou
Series: from dusk til dawn, i'll stay with you [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1727083
Comments: 2
Kudos: 34





	moonlight on the water, slipping through my hands

**Author's Note:**

> SPOILERS FOR SEASON 2 EPISODE 7. KIND OF. Basically, maybe don't read this unless you're up to date on plot and all that jazz. 
> 
> Feedback/comments/kudos/etc are love! See you next time Kyo needs to have his space to be dramatic!

He should have told her the truth. 

Kyo knew that he had chickened out, and had blamed it on the fact that he didn't want Tohru's pity, didn't want to bring up bad feelings about her own mother - a million little excuses to cover up the fact that he was too much of a fucking _coward_ to properly say the words out loud. He wasn't sure he had even talked about this with Master, and that man knew everything about him. If he couldn't say the words to him, how could he to her?

Well, because she was Tohru Honda. And she deserved honesty. And because if anyone on this godforsaken beach trip would understand, it was her. 

His nighttime conversations had been suspended, now that they were all under one roof. Tohru was sharing a room with Kisa, and although Kyo liked to sleep outside more often than not, he was still technically sharing a room. Not to mention, Shigure (that _asshole_ , who he hadn't forgiven for inviting _him_ here) would probably figure it out in an instant, and then he might be sent home and away from all of this. 

Not that he cared. Because he didn't. He hated the beach. He hated open water. He hated how Yuki made fucking litter box comments to him all the time. Ugh.

That meant that he was laying here, in the garden just outside of the front door, trying not to lose his mind because the cicadas were too loud, and trying to keep his train of thought going. If he couldn't actually talk to Tohru, he could close his eyes and imagine that she was on the bench nearby, or maybe sitting next to him pointing out silly or made up constellations to him, and then he might be able to tell her the truth. And if he was able to, he knew what he would say. 

_It wasn't an accident. My mom couldn't handle the fact that her kid was a zodiac animal let alone the stupid cat. Besides, people had been talking for years about how that bastard_ (even inside his own head, he couldn't call that man his father. That was Kazuma. It always would be) _would get drunk and come home, and she would show up at the main estate covered in bruises. But no one would ever let her leave, so she stayed with him and took the beatings and the yelling. And then she had me. Maybe if I was anything but the cat it would have been okay, you know? I can't even blame her for wanting out. If I- I don't know what I would do if I was her. Not like I ever will be, you know?_

_Anyway... the police told us it was an accident, that she must have been distracted or something. You don't just forget that a train's coming though. I figured someone at the big house paid them off so it would look better for the family. Can't have any bloodshed that the head doesn't cause, I guess. Whatever. She couldn't handle it anymore and she jumped in front of a moving train. She did it to get away from me, from him, from this fucking family... everyone._

Kyo knew that it would scare Tohru, and definitely make her cry. This was why he couldn't tell her, he reasoned. He was on Hiro's case enough for upsetting Tohru - what kind of asshole would he be if he told her something that he knew would upset her? The kind that would get his ass kicked by Yuki, Momiji, Kisa, Haru, maybe Hiro, Aya, Hatori... In that order. And then they would leave his scraggly remains for Hanajima to torture with her crazy brain waves and Uotani to put him through the paper shredder. 

Better not, he decided. Lying was the only option. 

And if that was the only thing he lied to her about, then it would be okay. But Gods, there was so much more. Things he didn't think he could ever tell anyone. Fears that he let consume him just for the sick kick of feeling _something_ in this fucked up world when he knew that it all meant nothing - that he meant nothing. But there was one thing that, no matter what happened, no matter who got involved, he would never ever say. The one thing that he would always lie about, especially to her. 

_Sometimes,_ he thought mournfully, _I wish that I was with her that day._

God, he was hopeless. Turning over on his side, Kyo decided that the night out here would be worth the bug bites. At least out here he had the space that would very soon be denied to him. 


End file.
